Christmas alone is not for the faint-hearted.
There’s music and laughter all around….. Parties every night…..TV specials on every cable station…. Everything reminds everyone that this is a time for togetherness and love. The shopping malls and other entertainment spots don’t make it any better. It just makes one realize what you don’t have, be it friends, family or even material needs - at a time when you see that everyone around you seem to have it all. Or so you think.
I just spent my first Christmas alone. Though I psyched myself days or maybe weeks before that I’ll be alright on Christmas, I wasn’t that sure if I’ll make it. I come from a family where Christmas celebrations are held sacred with traditions passed from one generation to the next. Christmas Eve is a time for family to cook and eat together, go to church, exchange gifts, tell stories and just simply be around each other to wait the arrival of Christ. Christmas Day is a time for a day and night long party with the bigger clan (and we are a big clan) with games, presentations, good food, great laughter and togetherness. Suffice it to say, being alone for Christmas makes it all the more harder for me, having come from that background. Or so I thought.
And then I got myself cooking – a grand party for one of steak and salad, mashed potatoes and garlic bread… I poured some diet soda as I ate my feast.
And thought my own thoughts... of how alone is great when you have peace. Alone doesn't mean loneliness when all is well and you have precious me-time to reflect, discern and be thankful for the life you have. Even the time to be alone is a blessing. The decision to live life alone is a challenge but a much better circumstance than living a life of constant lies, heartaches and betrayals, of promises not kept, of emotional battery.
I have found solitude. With the fireworks as backdrop to the stillness of my heart, I am grateful to the Lord for all the blessings. I am one with the manger as His birth is celebrated in all its simplicity and magnificence.
What a wonderful experience and time well spent. Merry Christmas!
About this Post: I wrote this post sometime after midnight of Christmas Eve, 2007. This was my first Christmas alone after my separation from my children's father (I had the kids for New Year).